An old friend asked me the other day why it has been so long since I updated this site, when I had so much to give.
I don't really know the answer to that, but it put me in a rather introspective mood...
so I am adding to it. And one of the things that I have decided to do, is revise this particular section.
The colors of trust... I named this site a long time ago...
It was a memorial for a lost love... a temple to my indominitable ego... and a testament to my battle for trust.. something that has never come easily for me.And perhaps that is why it has been so long. I found the trust I sought.
But I still write poetry... and there is still a good bit of fire in the old god's soul...
So, enough of my personal life... and on to poetry.
--JC, 5 June 2001
Sparrow
Wipe me away
little sparrow
with a tear.
Grow apart from the calling
of the lark and the wind
while the moon overhead
speaks of breezes
and I speak to the sun
with a nod and a grin
and it knows me by name
and by fame.Little sparrow:
you are the knife at my throat
my sword of Damocles
I cannot remember you,
I dare not,
my world shatters
with that tear.Men do not cry, little sparrow.
Who do you think I am?
What would you have
me be,
when words fail
strength lapses
tears fall
naked, alone, dying.Fly away, sparrow, beneath a leaf,
hide in the heather, in the fog
of early morn
in the shelter of a tree,
a heart, a soul, but
do not come
to me.Simple Sparrow,
my world is too complex, it
holds no room for you.
I do not want to see it
through your eyes
or see you through mine.You must not come, sparrow,
I must not cry,
my universe
stands
upon that,
layers and structures and
crystalline intricacies...but you, sparrow
can destroy all that
with a single
tear.
Your world is not
my world,
I have not been there
since last we met
and I cannot, I will not
return.Fly away, little sparrow.
I cannot afford
your interruptions, fool bird.
I have my own life now,
It is too complicated to explain in a day,
and there is no room here
for you. Be Gone.I am glad your wings are mended
I am glad that you can fly
but fly away,
you are free
fly away.
Please, my little sparrow,
fly away from me...
I cannot bear the sight
of you much longer
already boundaries fade
walls crumble
mirrors shatter
LET ME BE
and take away that key
you brought with you,
I do not need it.
I am as free as you
I am NOT caged,
not even in myself,
foolish sparrow.You cannot understand,
you cannot help
Just Go.
Fly.
Fly away
free
on the breeze
and let my eyes follow you
welcome you
home....
The Color of Trust
(A continuation of a piece by Robert Jordan)
The Way Of The Leaf
(complete with RealAudio of me reading it)
Knife
The Harbor Light
Quiescent Tempest
Keeper of the Flame
Return to Colors Of Trust Main